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Focusing the Mind for Deeper Meditation, Part V

Kundalini Awakening

When Kundalini Awakens

The sensations of the incoming and outgoing breath become finer and finer, threadlike, as you deepen your focus upon the infinitely nuanced vibrations that play in the central core of the body, especially in the spine.

The subtle sensations of breath may, at first, not be noticed because of the habit patterns of mind that are conditioned to chase after distractions of thoughts, memories, desires, likes/dislikes, pain/pleasure, etc.

You have the capacity to notice and feel exquisitely subtle sensations created by the movements of breath. I believe it just requires getting past the gatekeeper of the analytical mind just long enough to simply feel in the moment…and then slightly deeper.

The “slightly deeper” part, although not difficult to access, can be where the mind gets in the way. Even with strong intention to feel into subtle currents of the Life Force, the mind may not truly recognize the invitation of the moment when it has the opportunity to go once again “slightly deeper.”

The mind, in normal waking state, that vibrates in resonance with Earth density, cannot help but continue in its constant engagement with body, mind, ego, desires, etc. Recognition of the subtle Life Force seems to happen in those fleeting gaps when the mind is not “firing off,” in moments when the feeling connection is made with the sublime vibration (Kundalini). In those moments, there is only sensation/vibration, with an awareness of a deeper underlying connection with a nectar-like sweetness.

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Focusing the Mind for Deeper Meditation, Part II

Shaman's Dream III, art by Bruce Manaka

When connected feeling-wise with the subtle sensations that move through the body while meditating, the “practice” of meditation technique may fall away. In its place, meditation “practice” transforms into what seems to be more a natural and spontaneous dance of “micro-movements.”

These micro-movements are guided by the connection you develop with the refined energies of the Life Force, experienced as a most delicate and uplifting sensation felt in the central core of the spine.

As you gain greater familiarity with these subtle vibrations, you will come to understand how the body is able to spontaneously adjust and “posture” itself in infinitely nuanced “micro-movements.”

These “postures” and movements can only be described in most general terms, as it is not possible to adequately describe and quantify the infinite subtleties of how the awakening Life Force (Kundalini) moves through the interior landscape of body, bones, fascia.

When I watch certain kinds of dance, especially Balinese dance and belly dance, to me certain movements of hands/fingers and spine/neck are deeply reminiscent of the movements that I feel when connecting with the energies of Kundalini.

Perhaps the movements of the dancers can be described, taught and learned, but the infinite nuances of the internal “micro-movements” can only be intimated about, poetically rendered as a most delicious, nectar-like substance in the spine!

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Focusing the Mind for Deeper Meditation, Part I

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What happens when we normally sit for periods of meditation, with intention to focus the mind one-pointedly on the Divine? I know for myself that I spent years practicing techniques without going very deep in my meditations.

I had some nice experiences, but for the life of me, could not seem to make any headway into truly focusing the mind. I did not “get” the significance of feeling into the vibration of the “Life Force” and how the vibration itself, when experienced as an overall sensation, has a way of holding/gripping the mind in one-pointed focus, even if initially for just moments at a time.

I find it ironic that I had spent years practicing meditation techniques for purposes of focusing the mind and connecting with the subtle (Divine) currents, but with little improvement in my ability to focus!

I learned to sit for long periods of time, but with mind more oftentimes drifting into subconscious realms of memories, desires and even sleep!

To me it seems that I kept my meditation practice on the surface, focused on techniques and mental discipline, keeping the body seated in meditation posture for long periods. I did not consider the importance of listening and feeling deeply into the subtle vibrations and sensations that were there from the very beginning!

Apparently my regular practice of meditation techniques did not give me the focus of mind that I wanted in order to connect with the subtle currents. I believe now that although meditation techniques may not be enough to connect us with the subtle currents, they are very helpful once we have connected with them!

Here is what I believe happened in my own experience. The techniques and forms of my meditation practice kept me within a certain range of habits and patterns of consciousness.

I sat still during meditation, maintained a disciplined lifestyle in the ashram, adhered to a certain philosophy, etc. When things started to come crashing down in my life, I was given the first glimpses/impressions of very subtle sensations in the spine, connected with the not-so-subtle feelings of fear, panic…free fall!

It took years to gain deeper and deeper connection with these subtle sensations, which dramatically shifted the relationship with my Life Force and with my sense of Self.
My practice of meditation techniques has also drastically shifted and now seems more like a dance of “micro-movements.”

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The Paradox of Subtlety—When Kundalini Comes Like a “Thief in the Night” Part X

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When you begin to recognize the subtle forces at play…the push/pull/squeeze/twisting dynamics of the Life Force moving in the body, especially in the spine, then you will recognize the great gift you have been given that allows connection with the Divine Current!

It is the gift of being able to “tune-in” quickly to the proverbial “needle-in-a-haystack” of the exquisitely fine Bliss Resonance” vibrating deliciously in the spine!

The “Divine Current” can be thought of as a high frequency field of vibration that, through resonance, begins to shift the “density” of the body to a finer vibration. You will also find that whatever “lifts” and shifts the vibration of the body automatically tunes the mind to the higher frequency…again through principles of resonance.

The paradox is how close and easily accessible these subtle vibrations/sensations are! Your mind has the ability and capacity to naturally and quickly shift to a deeply focused, one-pointed attunement with the subtle currents.

In a nutshell, feeling into the fine sensations of the body (especially in the spine) has a way of focusing the mind. These moments might be fleeting in the beginning, but the visceral experience of connecting with finer and finer sensations gives you an inner acknowledgement (an inner “aha!”) of what happens when you “touch” the underlying sensation of the body/mind/psyche!

The experience is exquisitely subtle, but it is also a “big deal” because you recognize how very close and easily accessible the vibration has always been. It also represents a major shift in your relationship with your Life Force and your approach to meditation.

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The Paradox of Subtlety—When Kundalini Comes Like a “Thief in the Night” Part VII

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Regarding the feelings of “sweetness” mentioned in the previous post, I would like to elaborate further because it is, I believe, at the crux of the process of the awakening Life Force (Kundalini).

Of course, there is no “one-size-fits-all” process of what happens when Kundalini begins to awaken in individuals, but in my opinion, I believe there is a foundational vibration (of Kundalini) that imparts the Bliss response in the spine…which can manifest as “sweetness.”

As Kundalini begins to “awaken” in the spine, a refinement process takes place. For me, in the beginning this “refinement process” felt more like being worked on by jack hammer and wrecking ball! Hardly blissful or comfortable!

A lot of toxic and stuck energy in my body, mind and psyche had to be moved and expelled! Part of the “stuck” energy was my spiritual world view, which served me well for a number of years, but at a certain point got in the way through all the assumptions, expectations, beliefs and attachments regarding how things were “supposed” to work.

In a sense, I created a “hard shell” of protection around my world view, around all that was familiar and “safe” (which included my negative patterns of thoughts/behaviors as well).

Kundalini was like a great shaking that turned everything upside down, introducing me to a very different relationship and perspective with my sense of self and my Life Force.

It was/is a very wild ride! As well as paradoxical, non-linear, impossible to fully quantify or put into a step-by-step process!

Of course the mind likes to encapsulate, define and give meaning to things…and if I can “put in a nutshell” what the process of Kundalini is, I would describe it in this way: refine, purge, integrate…refine, purge, integrate…refine, purge, integrate…and on and on.

The periods of refining and purging are times when old and unhelpful structures of thoughts/behaviors are shifted and then released. The periods of integration allow for adjustment to the new and higher frequencies of being.

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The Paradox of Subtlety—When Kundalini Comes Like a “Thief in the Night” Part V

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When feeling into the “overall resonance” of the body, you might notice feeling a fine underlying vibration/sensation that can be tracked to deeper and deeper levels and that is refined to a most subtle “activating center.”

For me, this “activating center” is felt between the shoulder blades. It is “activating” in the sense that it seems to have a kind of push/pull play (like a magnet) of forces that creates a dance-like dynamic…between tension and relaxation, stillness and movement.

Another way of explaining this: if you observe the incoming breath, along with all the muscles involved with breathing in, you will feel a certain amount of tension, with a very subtle “lifting up” sensation. With the outgoing breath, you might feel a relaxation of tension, along with a “down-flow” of sensation.

Normally we do not pay much attention to the subtleties of the incoming and outgoing breath, but what I’m suggesting here in these posts is that, when you allow yourselves to explore the inner landscape of finer and finer sensations/vibrations, you will begin to also notice extremely nuanced forces at play in the body, especially in the the spine.

As you become familiar with these forces, you will also notice how the body will automatically, spontaneously adjust in most delicate micro-movements and ultimately in dance-like movements that allows for the greater expansion and flow of the Life Force, Kundalini.

This is all a play and dance of Kundalini, the activated primal life force in the spine. When connected with these subtle (and at times not-so-subtle) forces, you will have a very different perspective with your body, breath, life force, mind, Self and Nature…a perspective that experiences these things as waves of fine vibrations/sensations, connected with the underlying resonance or Hum of Creation!

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The Paradox of Subtlety—When Kundalini Comes Like a “Thief in the Night” Part IV

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In these posts I am suggesting the use of the sensitivity of your feelings to focus the mind…on finer and finer sensations, on the sensations that can be tracked to their “activating center.”

What I mean by this is that, as you continue to follow the trail of sensations to deeper and deeper levels of subtlety, at a certain point you will begin noticing your sense of “center,” the overall resonance of the body. Your activating center.

You will then get glimpses, flashes of yourself as an expansive wave of vibration…and this comes with a vastly different perspective and relationship with your body, mind and life force.

You will notice how it is easier to focus the mind when it is “held” by the sensation/vibration of the Life Force. Here is what happens: As you follow sensations in the body to deeper and deeper levels of subtlety, you will notice how the mind can focus upon extremely fine vibrations…which creates sensations that are exquisitely delicate…and which seem to have a kind of gravitational pull on the mind’s attention…because the sensations have an innately fine sweetness that spreads through the body the more you focus upon it.

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The Paradox of Subtlety—When Kundalini Comes Like “A Thief in the Night” Part I

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During the fleeting moments of “no-thought,” when the experience of all sensations/vibrations felt in the moment resolves in the mind to the primal “Hum” of the body, a visceral connection is made with the awakening Divine Current, the Life Force….Kundalini!

This is not necessarily a “Big Bang,” “Big Wow!” kind of experience. At least not at first. It may come as a gentle whisper, a quiet rumbling, like a beautiful song being played far off in the distance.

It is very clear, however, that in this experience, you have connected with and created a very different relationship and perspective with your Life Force and sense of Self. There can also be a major shift in your spiritual world view. You will see your belief system in a different light…and you may very well see some “systems” fall away from your life.

For me, as profoundly helpful and inspiring my spiritual beliefs and practices were to me in the beginning and for many years thereafter, at a certain point they began to have less meaning for me. As my perspective and relationship with my body, mind and life force began shifting to one that was more and more on a level of subtle sensations, the philosophies, stories, forms and practices of my spiritual world view began to fall away. My relationship/attunement with Spirit seemed to move towards a very different “resonance.”

The experience may come like “a thief in the night,” so very gently, unobtrusively…and yet the “reverberations” and “echoes” of this subtle vibration can have profound impact in your life!

It is such a paradox that a vibration (Kundalini) so subtle can “shake” things up to such a degree! To me it seemed like every little dark nook and cranny of my life had to surface and “see-the-light-of-day” so to speak.

Looking back at my years of sickness and dealing with so many of my previously unseen shadows, it seems fairly apparent to me now that my body, mind and psyche were not in sync with the subtle, yet fast-moving (like quicksilver), primal “hum” of the awakening Kundalini.

The process seems to go on and on…and on. Sometimes it feels like living with a giant motor that, through resonance, is bringing the “slow” motor of my body/mind/psyche “up-to-speed.”

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Learning to Transmute Desires, Part V

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I believe it is in noticing the small, incremental shifts in awareness that opens a pathway for us to feel into finer and finer nuances of sensations…and that ultimately opens us to experience ourselves as subtle “waves” of vibrations.

As you begin to notice the overall resonance of the body, you may also start to notice the mind shifting, going into an inwardly focused state as it attunes to the subtle vibrations of the body.

Now, without conscious intention to feel deeper and deeper into subtlety, the mind remains at a certain depth and at some point is distracted by thoughts, memories, outside distractions, etc.

However, with strong intention to maintain one-pointed focus on subtle sensations of the body, you begin to experience fleeting moments of “no-thought,” when for a moment there is just a simple “noticing” of the overall feeling of the body.

I have found it important to continue holding the intention to go deeper and deeper into the overall vibration (hum) of the body. For me, when feeling into the “hum,” it seems that the vibration itself has a way of holding, gripping the mind into one-pointed focus.

This is a subtlety of the Life Force, that when awakened, seems to activate the body to spontaneously move and adjust in order to manage the increasing “voltage” of energy moving through the spine and rest of the body.

As you gain more facility and capacity for this ever-increasing “current,” the spontaneous movements of the body become more and more like a beautiful and delicate dance of Life Force in the body!

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Learning to Transmute Desires, Part III

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I believe it is important to experience what we might think of as “bad habits” from a different perspective…namely a different feeling perspective. Let me explain what I mean. Normally, our habitual patterns of behaviors get played out again and again, with little or no resistance to change the patterns.

This is all fine and good if the habits are of a beneficial nature…healthy eating habits, regular exercise routine, positive temperament, etc. However, if the habits are not so beneficial, then it can be quite torturous to feel helplessly caught in the currents of bad thought and behavior patterns that we seem to have little or no power to redirect.

A different approach that I am suggesting here is in feeling the overall sense of yourselves from a perspective that observes the “agitation” of desires with the intention to follow the activating desire impulses to finer and more subtle vibrations.

In other words, in following the activating sensations (of any desire) to their point of finer and finer subtlety, a different perspective of the impulses is experienced, one that allows them to be shifted/transmuted, through resonance, with the vastly wider underlying vibration of the body. This “underlying” vibration of the body has a way of absorbing the agitation of desires, just as the Ocean is able to absorb the largest and most boisterous of rivers.

Once you have experienced desire impulses from the perspective of consciously observing, consciously feeling their subtle vibratory nature, then you will also understand their relationship to the wider field or current of “Life Force.”

In other words, the impulse/vibration/sensation of desires can be felt in relation to a more expansive vibration that does not get stuck in one area of the body. This allows the “agitation” of desires to be absorbed and transmuted by the wider and deeper field of the overall sensation of Being.

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